Holy Cow!

The Streets of Delhi

I cannot recommend India to amateurs or anybody with a compromised immune system. It's a very unforgiving place.  One wrong move and you can lose EVERYTHING.  One wrong ice cube and you'll wish you never came.  Home to the most beautiful and promising sights, sounds and smells lies the most horrid and horrendous sights, sounds and smells in the known universe.  It is full sensory overload.  It is the good, the bad & the ugly.  It is India.  It is a nation that dares to be different.  It is a world where scary airplane landings are applauded.  A world where passengers tackle each other in a scrum at the door while the plane's still moving.  It is in this world that I decide to get off last. And, much like the tunnel we experience at the moment of death, our exit ramp goes steeper and steeper, forcing us deeper and faster into India; Delhi to be exact.  Good Lord.

It is the filthiest place you can never imagine; a wild combination of piss & shit with phlegm and flies and earth under massive piles of garbage surrounded by hot, sweaty and dirty crowds.  The honking and begging never ceases.  And 48 degree Celsius temperatures just seem to wreak havoc on all of it.  Or so that is my opinion.  The locals know the rolling cramps as a "No shower, full power, 24-hour" stomach ailment.  The world refers to it as the Delhi Belly. Whatever you choose to name it, it cripples even those with a steel gut, and it comes for free with every visit.

Oh, the romantic symphony of chaotic horns; the deep blasts, the high-pitched beeps, staccato honks, the fog horns and the musical notes, you'd think Delhi is blind and driving by sound.  Here, the pecking order is as follows: Pedestrians yield to bikes, bikes yield to rickshaws, rickshaws to tuk-tuks, tuk-tuks to cars, cars to trucks and buses, and everything yields to the King of the Road,  The Holy Cow.

Ah yes, the Holy Cow- the source of all of their problems.  Patties large and small melt and bake in the heat and sun as flies fester and spread shit to the kitchens and tables of all who will dine while in India.  If Karma is the result of action, then it is their karma to be sick forever.  People toss trash on the ground as if it'll magically grow into fruit trees.

Delhi is a series of 8 cities that have been ruled and ruined by sultans, slave dynasties, horse traders, Mogul Kings, and of course the British Raj.  It is decrepit and worn down by centuries of invasion.  Delhi is victim to plundering, squandering, depletion and desertification.  It has been lain to ruins ten times in its history; the streets last ran with blood in 1947 and 1983.  Major underemployment, the lingering caste system, the legacy of British Imperialism, and a lack of education, resources & infrastructure have led me to make attempts to avoid Delhi like the plague that it is...